Thornton P. Knowles On Stupidity And Willful Ignorance

Nature has a way of dealing with stupidity. Only the smart and strong survive. In civilized society, however, stupid people suffer, but due to societal kindness, they can survive. It's when a society rewards stupidity and willful ignorance that the trouble begins. And nowhere is stupidity and willful ignorance more rewarded than in the United States Congress. It also resides comfortably within our judicial system. Ignorance is very difficult to cure, and if allowed to spread and flourish, especially among our leaders, it can bring a nation down.

Thornton P. Knowles 

Thornton P. Knowles On The Mystery Of The Creative Process

Many novelists are reluctant to discuss the creative process--that is, how and where they get their ideas, talent, and inspiration to write. Many deny that talent is an inborn phenomenons, while others ridicule the notion that writers have to be inspired to create. Perhaps having the creative impulse is less a mystery than the lack of creativity in a person. When a reader tells me that he can't imagine how I and others produce novels, I wonder why some people cannot. The truth is, I have no idea how, or even why, I'm compelled to write creatively. Rather than contemplate how or why, I just do it.

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On The Length Of A Novel

At a writer's conference, an aspiring writer working on a piece of fiction asked me how many words she had to write before her book qualified as a novel. I said the minimum word count, in that regard, ranged around 60,000 words. She said, "Oh great, then I'm finished!" Upon that, all the other hopeful authors in the room congratulated her with a round of applause. Who are these people?

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On Pretentious Humor

The bartender at a writer's conference I spoke at in Morgantown, West Virginia wore a name tag that read, TRUMAN CAPOTE. In the spirit of the joke, I ordered an "In Cold Bloody Mary". The barkeep didn't even crack a smile. I guessed it wasn't a West Virginia kind of joke, then realized it was simply pretentious, professorial humor. It wasn't funny. I got fall-down drunk that night worrying that I had morphed from a writer into a cold-blooded academic.

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On Writing In The Correct Person And Point-Of-View

One of my students opened a story with: "Three months before my sudden death in my girlfriend's car, I went fishing on the Ohio River." Intrigued by this opening line, I asked the student if he intended using the wrong person and point-of-view in an experimental piece of fiction. Or perhaps he was taking a stab at humor. When the kid told me he wasn't experimenting, or trying to be funny, the sentence lost its charm. The kid simply didn't know how to write. Even worse, he didn't know how to BS himself into a better grade.

Thornton P. Knowles  

Thornton P. Knowles On Receiving a Bad Review

A writer for Kirkus, in reviewing one of my crime novels, said the book featured a cast of vile hillbillies in a trashy setting who said and did things to each other that would turn the stomach of a murder scene investigator. She wrote that good taste demanded that she put the book down after page 20, but was ashamed to admit that out of the kind of morbid curiosity that makes passing motorists gawk at a bloody traffic accident, she finished my "trashy and brutal" novel. It was a terrible review, really bad. I framed that one.

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On The Mystery Of Advanced Math And Intellectual Superiority

For me, math is adding, subtracting, multiplying, fractions, and percentages. Beyond that, math is a mystery I was never able to solve. Maybe that's because I'm not smart enough to figure out the clues. I'll  have to live with knowing there's a universe of knowledge out there beyond me. Does that make me feel inferior? Hell yes. On a good day, if I stretch intellectually, I can touch the bottom of mediocrity. The thing is though, having great self-worth is the worst thing for a novelist. I guess that's why I'm a fairly good crime writer. Anyway, I don't think I have the personality for brain excellence. Being intellectually excellent is a burden I don't have to carry.

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On His Unfinished Short Story

I started a short story called Who's Afraid of Emily Post? The piece featured a protagonist who was obsessed with always saying the right thing. The poor fellow hanged himself after innocently asking an un-pregnant heavy woman when she was due. I couldn't finish it. Where do you go from there?

Thornton P. Knowles 

Thornton P. Knowles On Bringing Back The Insult, "Flannel Mouth"

When I was growing up, I heard my father use the term "Flannel Mouth" to describe someone he considered a bragging, loud-mouthed, BS artist. I liked the sound of this insult, and in my earliest writings, used the term a lot. "Flannel mouth" gradually fell out of use, and eventually became obsolete. Worried that my father had made it up, I checked my dictionary and found "Flannel-Mouthed: 1. Speaking thickly, as if one's mouth were full of flannel. 2. Smooth-talking in an insecure way." Since the term perfectly describes the self-promoting, pompous, from-the-pulpit-toned speeches delivered by so many politicians, I'd like to bring "flannel mouth" back into common usage. I think it's needed now more than ever.

Thornton P. Knowles

Thornton P. Knowles On Flunking Seventh Grade

I have the distinction of having flunked seventh grade in West Virginia. I hated school, and my cruel, dimwitted teacher, hated me. My distraught and embarrassed parents considered moving to another town, and, when referring to the family tragedy, never used the word "flunked." They preferred "retained." Yeah, I was "retained" because my teacher couldn't bear to let me go. But for me, it wasn't all bad. Two months after she "retained" me, the seventh grade teacher died of a hardened heart. She was replaced by a younger, friendlier, but equally dull teacher who just happened to be really nice to look at. Most important, while I didn't learn anything in my seventh grades, this humiliating chapter in my life taught me the power of words.

Thornton P. Knowles